Introduction: How Will They Know?
Jesus once gave His followers a remarkably simple way to identify themselves to the world.
He didn’t say people would recognize us by the churches we build.
Or by how much Scripture we know.
Or by how well we can defend our beliefs.
Or even by how often we’re right.
He simply said:
“By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”
Love.
That’s supposed to be our identifying marker.
And lately, I’ve found myself wondering what it would look like if we took those words completely seriously—which, of course, we should do since Jesus said them.
Not just on Sundays.
Not just with our families and friends.
Not just with people who think like we do, look like we do, vote like we do, believe like we do, or treat us kindly.
What if love became the filter through which we passed virtually everything we did?
Every conversation.
Every disagreement.
Every social media post.
Every response to an insult.
Every interaction with a stranger.
Every ordinary moment of every ordinary day.
Paul puts it about as simply as possible:
Everything.
That’s a pretty high bar.
What Does “Everything” Mean?
I’ve been thinking about what that command might mean practically.
If I am going to say something to another person, can I say it in love?
If I am going to do something that affects someone else, can I do it in love?
If I am going to post something online, can I post it in love?
If I am going to disagree with someone, can I disagree in love?
And if I can’t…
maybe I shouldn’t do it.
Or perhaps I need to find another way to do it.
Because love finds a way.
That doesn’t mean every interaction needs to be sentimental.
It doesn’t mean we spend our days wandering around telling everyone how wonderful they are.
And it certainly doesn’t mean we have to agree with everyone.
Jesus didn’t.
Love Doesn’t Mean Agreement
Jesus regularly disagreed with people.
He confronted hypocrisy.
He challenged religious leaders.
He called people to repentance.
He overturned tables in the temple.
He never confused love with approval.
Neither should we.
There are times when loving someone means telling the truth.
Paul describes Christian maturity as:
“…speaking the truth in love…”
Notice that he doesn’t tell us to choose between the two.
Truth without love can become a weapon.
Love without truth can become little more than sentimentality.
Jesus embodied both.
So if I believe someone is wrong, love doesn’t require me to pretend otherwise.
But it should affect how I respond.
I can disagree without belittling.
Correct without humiliating.
Establish boundaries without hating.
Stand for what I believe without treating someone who disagrees with me as my enemy.
And even if someone chooses to make himself my enemy, Jesus gives us some rather uncomfortable instructions:
Apparently, nobody gets excluded from “everything.”
But Have You Met People?
This all sounds wonderful until we actually encounter other human beings.
Because people can be difficult.
Some are angry.
Some are rude.
Some are selfish.
Some seem to enjoy provoking others.
Spend five minutes reading comments on almost any controversial subject online and you’ll discover that humanity hasn’t exactly perfected this love-your-neighbor thing.
So what do we do when someone comes at us with anger, hatred, contempt, cruelty, or even foolishness?
Our natural instinct is often to return fire.
But Paul offers another way:
“Do not repay anyone evil for evil.”
And a few verses later:
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
I love that. Easier to say than to do, but still, it is sage guidance.
Don’t let someone else’s behavior determine yours.
Someone else’s cruelty doesn’t give me permission to become cruel.
Someone else’s anger doesn’t require my anger.
Someone else’s insult doesn’t require my insult.
Someone else’s contempt doesn’t justify my contempt.
If I respond to hatred with more hatred, hatred wins.
I’ve allowed someone else’s behavior to change mine.
But love finds another way.
Love Is Not a Greeting Card Sentiment
It’s easy to talk about love as though it’s something soft.
Pleasant.
Polite.
A nice sentiment printed inside a greeting card.
But that’s not the love Jesus demonstrated.
Biblical love is powerful.
It moves toward people who are hurting.
It forgives people who don’t deserve forgiveness.
It serves people who can offer nothing in return.
It stands up for people who are being mistreated.
It tells the truth when remaining silent would be easier.
It absorbs an offense rather than passing it along to someone else.
And ultimately, it lays down its life for another.
Jesus said:
Then He showed us exactly what He meant.
The cross is what God’s love looks like when fully unleashed upon a broken world.
It isn’t passive.
It isn’t weak.
And it certainly isn’t sentimental.
Love is a force that changes the world.
It changes relationships.
It changes enemies into friends.
It changes broken people.
It changes the person receiving it.
And perhaps most importantly, it changes the person doing the loving.
Imagine what could happen if millions of followers of Jesus began taking seriously His command to love this way.
Not merely talking about God’s love.
Deploying it.
One conversation.
One act of forgiveness.
One meal.
One encouraging word.
One difficult relationship.
One hurting person at a time.
Maybe we spend too much time wondering how Christians can change the world.
Jesus already told us.
Love finds a way.
What Made Jesus So Compelling?
When I read the Gospels (and watch The Chosen), I’m continually struck by how people flocked to Jesus.
Crowds followed Him everywhere.
They pressed around Him.
They brought their children to Him.
They brought their sick friends and family members.
People climbed trees to see Him.
One group was so desperate to get a friend near Him that they tore a hole through somebody’s roof.
Certainly, some came because they wanted to see miracles or hoped Jesus would heal them.
But I suspect there was something else that made Him compelling.
People who had spent much of their lives feeling judged, rejected, ignored, or condemned discovered that Jesus was different.
He saw them.
The woman at the well.
Zacchaeus.
The woman caught in adultery.
Lepers whom others wouldn’t touch.
Children whom His own disciples tried to send away.
Tax collectors.
Sinners.
Outcasts.
You and me.
Jesus didn’t pretend their sins didn’t matter.
But neither did He reduce them to their sins.
He saw people whom God loved.
And they knew it.
What If We Looked More Like Jesus?
Sometimes I wonder what would happen if every follower of Christ treated people that way.
What if the people around us knew beyond any doubt:
Christians aren’t here to condemn me.
They’re here to love me.
They’re here to listen.
To encourage.
To help.
To pray.
To walk beside me when life falls apart.
To tell me the truth when I need to hear it.
And, most importantly, to introduce me to the God who loves me more than I can possibly imagine.
I wonder how full our churches might be if that’s what people consistently experienced from those of us who claim the name of Christ.
Jesus said love would identify us as His followers.
John takes the idea even further:
Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.
Then he says something extraordinary:
No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.
No one has seen God.
But perhaps they can catch a glimpse of Him through us.
Showing People What God Is Like
That’s where this becomes much bigger than simply trying to be nicer.
When we love someone, we have an opportunity to reveal something about the character of God.
A God who doesn’t wait for people to clean themselves up before loving them.
A God who loved us while we were still sinners.
Paul writes:
That’s the message we have the privilege of carrying into the world.
Not:
Get yourself straightened out, and maybe God will love you.
But:
God already loves you.
He loves you enough that He sent His Son for you.
Jesus willingly took upon Himself the consequences of everything you and I have ever done wrong.
That’s not a message of condemnation.
That’s the greatest love story ever told.
And perhaps people will be more willing to hear about God’s love when they have already experienced some of it through us.
Love Finds a Way
So what does this look like tomorrow morning?
Probably nothing dramatic.
It might mean listening when we’d rather talk.
Being patient when we’re irritated.
Forgiving when we’re hurt.
Helping someone who can’t repay us.
Refusing to join a conversation that’s tearing someone else down.
Responding gently to someone who speaks harshly.
Praying for someone who has mistreated us.
Telling someone the truth because we genuinely care about that person’s well-being—not because we want to prove ourselves right.
Sometimes love may require a difficult conversation.
Sometimes love establishes a boundary.
Sometimes love says no.
Sometimes love confronts.
Sometimes love forgives.
Sometimes love serves.
Sometimes love simply sits quietly beside someone who is hurting.
Love doesn’t always look the same.
But love always seeks the good of the other person.
A Simple Question
Maybe there’s a simple way to begin.
Before I speak…
Can I say this in love?
Before I respond…
Can I respond in love?
Before I post…
Can I post this in love?
Before I act…
Can I do this in love?
And if the answer is no…
maybe I shouldn’t do it.
Or maybe I simply haven’t found the right way yet.
Because Jesus didn’t call us to win every argument.
He called us to follow Him.
And He told us exactly how the world would recognize us when we do.
By our love.
A Final Encouragement
The world has plenty of anger.
Plenty of judgment.
Plenty of division.
Plenty of people shouting at one another.
I’m sure it doesn’t need Christians adding more of the same.
What it desperately needs is Jesus.
And for reasons I don’t completely understand, Jesus has chosen people like you and me to help show the world what He is like.
Imperfect people.
Still-growing people.
People who sometimes lose our patience and say things we wish we could take back.
But people in whom His Spirit lives.
People learning, one interaction at a time, to love as He loved us.
Maybe that’s one of the greatest opportunities we have each day.
To leave the people we encounter with a slightly better understanding of what God is like because they encountered His love through us.
So when anger says, strike back…
Love finds a way.
When pride says, prove you’re right…
Love finds a way.
When disagreement says, make them your enemy…
Love finds a way.
And when we aren’t sure what to say or what to do…
perhaps we can simply ask:
Jesus, how would You love this person right now?
Then follow where He leads.
Because if love is how the world is supposed to recognize us…
may we give them plenty of evidence.
A Question to Sit With
If someone knew nothing about Jesus except what they experienced through me today…
what would they believe He is like?
Master's Canvas - Writing & Photography by David K. Carpenter 